I didn't eat today

I wanted to see how long

I could stand the hunger

until the sun came up

I know there are those

who don't choose it but

they feel it all the same

until the sun comes up

I feel my legs in water

I wade through the lake

back to something

but I always seem to float back

to my island in the middle

I want to get something done

to be like you, to keep walking

even when your feet sting

I look into the eyes of those

who I think expect something

but they don't want nothing

but a nod 

I am hard pressed against myself

caught between love and loathing

The child in my heart shows her face

only so often 

Its hard to draw her out

There was once someone 

carefree who loved to entertain

now she is hiding behind

a slow and still face

That looks at the floor most days

afraid to meet your gaze

Its not that I don't like you

I'm just shy

I'm hard pressed against myself 

caught between love and loathing

the child in my heart shows her face only so often

Its hard to draw her out

rainbow river

A7       E
Trying not to think too hard
about all that is outside of me
because if I cling to it all
I'll be in pieces

A7       E
The river of my soul
is fluid and sweet
But you will find life's debris
caked along the banks

A        E
Oh how do I decide
what to keep
and what to put aside
will these memories
stay or die
G     A
Cause I'm tired


A7      E
You say you want to leave the world
that the sickness has done you in
cyclical and sad as it is
the worst is in your eyes

where is the mercy you cry
into the the very of black night
the response is quiet and shy
G     A
and full of stars

I wanted to believe'
I wanted to believe
2x
in the night